Lukewarm Christians: I was BORN AGAIN when I was 6,10 or in 7th grade

Friday August 30th , 2013

Revelation 3:16

So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.

Blog number 3 on my Lukewarm Christian Series.

DISCLAIMER: This blog does not claim to discredit people that truly gave their life to Christ at ages 6,10, or in the 7th grade. Those that have since lived and walked in the way of the Lord. When trials and tribulations came they leaned on the God all mighty and their sword and shield the BIBLE to win all their life battles.

Now that's out of the way,if you are someone who does claim to be BORN AGAIN and gave your life to receive Jesus Christ into your lives when you were 6 or 7 years of age, in the 7th grade or at a young age and you don't understand the bible, it's scriptures, and intercessory prayer is needed when you face temptation in sin or a dilemma then I would HIGHLY recommend you reconsider your Born Again stance.

I regularly come across Christians, well maybe not regularly but I have come across "Christians" who tell me they gave their life to Jesus when they were ya tall and ya high. But the things I hear and see on social media and presently in their life, I'll say if Jesus came this very second, I think they'll be scattering real fast to clean up their act; if they feel conviction anymore that is.

If you were able to read my testimony on how I became truly BORN AGAIN at the age of 21, then you'll see I mentioned I had received Jesus into my life at the age of 10 years old. But because I didn't endeavor to read my bible or seek the things of God I fell into deep sin. So this can be true but in exploring the word and growing as a mature Christian, I wasn't born again, until last year when I repented ALL my sins(the ones I could remember), and sought to truly live a life for Christ despite any distractions.

Let me explain:

From every bible character, to Jesus's words(perfect man), to every verse, when someone identifies with Jesus they are expected to keep the ordinances of God(his rules)

Colossians 2:20

Wherefore if ye be dead with Christ from the rudiments of the world, why, as though living in the world, are ye subject to ordinances,

This Colossians verse explains when your sins die with Christ who bore your sins, then you should not live like the world. In my generation's scenario, as Christians these social media trends like "lesbian crush Wednesdays" are NOT acceptable; also cursing is a big one, as Christians if you aren't striving to rid your mouth of cursing that's a problem. Our mouths produce blessings NOT curses.

The bible identifies some people who have said the salvation prayer might still be living in fear. In fact there is a ministry called Deliverance, and it's done for people who might have unclean spirits within them but consciously known they are a child of God. THIS is not for those types of people. Honestly when you have TRUE salvation and are born again you should feel JOY, HAPPINESS, you should wanna skip and do a cartwheel..honestly:

Philippians 2:12-13

Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure.

If you are saved? For whatever reason, if you are trembling with fear know you no longer live by your strength. God lives within you and his strength is now your strength. Many lukewarm Christians who ride on their salvation from him how many years ago, don't know their body isn't theirs. They go around doing their own things and not God's status and rules. In turn their cycle of sin is endless.

James 1:22

But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves.

Luckily for all of us, this exact James 1:22 verse is repeated all through out the bible in different words. This is why I recognized although I may have been a Jesus Lover in middle school and high school. I clearly heard the word of God, about lying, stealing, and whatever sin I chose to do, by not being a doer of the word. In my Jesus loving state I clearly rejected the word of God. so NO, I can not claim I was Born Again, I was a sinner in need of God's redemption. I didn't have a personal relationship with the Son of God Jesus. I played religion. So if any of those people that claim to be born again ions ago they are in error. As believers of Jesus Christ we OBEY , DAILY to his commandments. And when there may be a lustful thought that comes in our mind, or inkling of sin we are about to commit, our holy spirit convicts us real real fast. If you aren't ushering the presence of God into your life daily the holy spirit is staying CLEAR from your heart.

1 Peter 3:15

15 But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear

You know and see a true believer when they are striving to know the lord. Yes it's true many will and have started to grow weary of doing God's work and living for God. This is enemy wanting to attack, but look there is a verses for that, God recognizes this and tells us in Galatians 6:9 to not be weary in doing good because there is always a reward for good works!! So in this 1st Peter verse it talks about sanctification. Once you receive salvation you must and can't stay at that. God naturally will allow you to get closer to him; but you have free will and it's how much effort you put into it. You must strive to be sanctified, to be SET APART from this world, and then to have your adamic nature of sin die! Being a Sunday, Sunday, once in a while Christian won't get you anywhere in life, but confusion,sorrow, and wondering if there really is a GOD.

Lastly:

Galatians 5:16-21

GOD’S WORD Translation (GW)

16 Let me explain further. Live your life as your spiritual nature directs you. Then you will never follow through on what your corrupt nature wants. 17 What your corrupt nature wants is contrary to what your spiritual nature wants, and what your spiritual nature wants is contrary to what your corrupt nature wants. They are opposed to each other. As a result, you don’t always do what you intend to do. 18 If your spiritual nature is your guide, you are not subject to Moses’ laws.

19 Now, the effects of the corrupt nature are obvious: illicit sex, perversion, promiscuity, 20 idolatry, drug use, hatred, rivalry, jealousy, angry outbursts, selfish ambition, conflict, factions, 21 envy, drunkenness, wild partying, and similar things. I’ve told you in the past and I’m telling you again that people who do these kinds of things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

Ok, again no way could I have been born again. According to the above as a child of God, saved, and sanctified you must live in  the spirit and not the FLESH. I was into illicit sex, perversion, promiscuity, drug use, hatred  rivalry, jealousy,  anger, selfish, in conflict with others, envious, drunken  and partied .DANG! I broke all the commandments. SO YOU please, CHRISTIANITY IS NOT A JOKE. THE spitting and WHIPPING JESUS got on that cross is not to be played with. If you identify as a Christian and have broken those sins above, you are NOT born again.

But listen if you've already realized you are/were not living right with God and have realized your mistakes, then THAT date is when you truly repented and gave your life to Jesus Christ. If you are reading this blog and realize you are living in error, that you are around lukewarm christian friends or unbelievers, that you are in a church that chooses to gratify the flesh but won't point out things that will get you into hell, but glosses over matters that detest God, it is NOT TOO LATE. Brother, sister kneel down, today say, Jesus I am sorry and repent of all my sins. I pray you forgive me and wash my clean with your blood. I receive you into my life. I pray to live for you and only you. AMEN

AMEN, you must now believe you are washed clean. You must now make up your mind to read the word of God to grow in knowledge and grow in faith.

I understand this blog may be a sensitive issue. Because as many Christians want to remind me,that only JESUS sees the heart of man. In the God also says when you pray God can reveal the heart of man to you. There are many Christians in error. I was once one of them..

God Bless you <3. Till my next topic on the series...

(Last meeting/outing with my Pinky Promise Sisters)

Lets Connect on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram 

From your Sister in Christ with a Servants Heart,

Janet Adeola Songonuga

*Please "Like", comment, and share this post if this spoke to you. Subscribe to the right for more.*

Lukewarm Christians: YES! I love him but I am not ready to marry him

Revelation 3:16

So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.

Blog number #2 of my Lukewarm Christian series. Let's start with a typical scenario:

Me: Hey girl how are you? What did you do last night?

Sister A : I am so blessed! I really thank God. Last night me and my boyfriend just hung out at home. It was so fun. We talked, laughed, I cooked dinner for him, we split the bill thank God, and you know we did a little romancing ;)

Me: Did you two have sex?

Sister A: Not exactly. Does oral sex count? 

Me: Yea, oral sex counts, vaginal sex counts. 

Sister A: He is such a gentleman. Our 2 year anniversary is next month. I love him so much! And you know you've talked to him, he loves me too.

Me: Yea, I guess he does love you. So when are you two finally getting married?

Sister A: Marriage!!? No way, I love him but I am not ready for that yet. Yea, even though we are both out of school, even if we were in school, we def can't get married now!

Me: Really? why not?

PAUSE

I don't know the exact statistic, but I know before I became born again this was the story of all 6 girls I called best friends , actually it was also the story of 90% of my cheerleading team, I breathed, ate, and slept with. It's so rampant in the Christian community that many, SO MANY "Christian" couples are dating rather than courtship!

What is Dating?

Dating is engaging with the opposite or same sex(homosexuality=sin) without an expected end. You don't know if you'll marry but you are just hanging out with emotional and many other benefits, as far as one chooses to go. 

• Spends a ton of time alone which presents a ton of temptations
• Family most times isn't as involved
• Foreplay, not going all the way, going all the way, "test driving each other"
• No clear purpose-- just a lot of conditional dating & confusion on "where is this relationship going??!)
• Plays house. Calls each other wifey & hubby & does husband & wife like things but has no commitment
• There's still a option to date others, ya'll aren't totally sold & still "trying each other out"

Dating is a CLEAR cut worldly rendition of how a girl/woman , boy/man interact. Even if a couple that is dating gets married, this is NOT the way biblical characters got married. In the bible God reveled the will of God to the man in whom he should marry. This marriage thing wasn't a chasing thing. It wasn't a 2,3,4,5 year thing. It wasn't performing and playing house thing before marriage. 

Let's open the bible real quick to one of my favorite examples of a courtship in the bible:

Genesis 24

Issac, Abraham's oldest son was getting old. He favored Issac and one day asked his Servant to go and find a wife for Issac in his homeland. The servant departs without Issac ,  but with camels and treasures. He stops  by a water well and prays a prayer to God asking a women comes along to offer him and his camels water to drink; he includes in the prayer the women be Issac's wife. (REMEMBER GOD ALWAYS HEARS PRAYERS OF RIGHTEOUS PEOPLE. THE SERVANT WAS RIGHTEOUS  SINLESS AND ABRAHAM ALSO PRAYED AND WAS RIGHTEOUS) Before the servant was done praying Rebekah, a very beautiful woman, a woman after God's heart, and a virgin comes! Rebekah gladly draws water for the servant when he asks. Without being asked Rebekah also draws water for all his 10 camels  What a sweetheart!  God confirms to servant Rebekah is Issac's wife. (FUNNY REBECCA WASN'T LOOKING AND DID NOTHING BUT SERVE GOD TO RECEIVE HER MAN) The Servant then gets to meet Rebekah's family. He asks Rebekah's father for her hand in marriage. He says yes,

Genesis 24:67

And Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah's tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mother's death.

So what is courting? How can it be explained and done in the 21st century?

• Takes the position that the two people have no physical contact at all (no touching, no hand-holding, no kissing) until marriage. 
• Many in a courtship relationship will not spend any time together unless family members, preferably parents, are present at all times.
•  Courting couples state up front that their intentions are to see if the other person is a suitable potential marriage partner. 
• Courtship allows for the two people to truly get to know each other in a more platonic setting without the pressures of physical intimacy or emotions clouding their view.

Many Christians are wondering why their relationships are an emotional roller coaster! What you heard love is, is wrong! Love is not being hurt, screaming to then lead to makeup sex, it's not slashing tiers, looking  through facebook messages, texts, and instagrams with a fake profile. Love is not mean spirited and hot tempered.  Love is not dating for how many years! Love is not playing wife without the commitment! Love is what JESUS told us what love is.

1st Corinthians 13: 4-8a

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails.

This lukewarness of how we are treating our brothers and sisters in Christ should stop. Because this dating phenomenal has manifested inside the church many women and men are being left bruised. I want you to ask yourself if you call yourself a Christian are you Born Again? When did you kneel down and repent of your sins, and ask the blood of Jesus to wash you clean? If you are Born again are you believing? Are you daily saying to yourself I will live for Jesus and I will read the bible, his personal guidebook for my life? It's only when you genuinely answer these questions you'll understand it's not ok to date, have pre-matial sex, and even if you do have pre-marital sex to not go around saying you love someone but are not ready to marry them. If all your emotions are fully invested in someone, you two need to start praying for the will of God in marriage.

I love you dearly. I too was in relationships that didn't have an expected end; But like you I enjoyed the company and we both quote on quote loved each other. Sis, that will lead you to HELL and a VERY unhappy life down the line. The best thing is to ask God for the strength to stop it. When you do, watch, live for God, your dream man will come.

(More pics from the Global Christian Event Network 4th Annual Night of Gospel Laugh)

Lets Connect on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram 

From your Sister in Christ with a Servants Heart,

Janet Adeola Songonuga

*Please "Like", comment, and share this post if this spoke to you. Subscribe to the right for more.*

Lukewarm Christians: Trust and Obey

Sunday August 25th , 2013

Revelation 3:16

So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.

Because people were lukewarm, they were neither on one side, cold, or on the other, hot, God casted them out of his mouth, basically going towards hell out of his sight and not toward heaven. 

This type of feeling, lukewarmness has plagued the Christian community. Many Christians claim they love Jesus but their faith is neither hot or cold. Their knowledge of the bible is neither hot, an hunger for memorizing the word, nor cold, not reading let alone wanting to memorize the word.

In light of this LUKEWARMNESS that has plagued my generation and this world I am blogging on a series called Lukewarm Christians. As stated in the title todays' will be to Trust and Obey:

There are so many quote and quote "Christians" that are miserable, unhappy, and still seeking something to fill their void and happiness...Remember this SONG: TRUST AND OBEY. If we all actually trusted and obeyed GOD'S commands, stopped having sex before marriage, read our bible daily, seek him more, worship him more, stopped drinking and clubbing, stopped committing fraud, stopped seeking praise from instagram and social media, stop lying..
How BLESSED would YOUR LIVES BE!??

Many Christian "ENDURE" Christianity rather than "ENJOY" Christianity which is what God intended us to do. 

John 10:10

The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.

There are so many existing things on this earth that want to steal your joy, happiness and peace, but the one thing that came to give you abundant life should not be the cause of any pain.

Why are you saying you are Born Again? Love the lord but still plagued with sin? Or find it difficult to go to a church or read the word?

People who identify this way need to just surrender themselves and recognize their mind's judgement is not the right one. We must forsake our own thinking. In dealing with the things of God, what you think is right, wrong, or indifferent doesn't matter. So de-clutter your mind of your thoughts. Give and submit yourself unto the Lord and let him start filling your mind with his thoughts from the word of God, the Bible.

Trusting and obeying God is quite simple. You must yes one, repent of your sins and become born again, then start believing and living for Christ, but the key is to continue to climb and strive for holiness and righteousness. It's through your seeking more of God and remaining pure trusting and obeying God becomes easy. If one stays in a lukewarm state meaning, one day you choose to strive for holiness and righteousness and the next day you want to commit all the sins you want, then trusting and obeying God will be very hard for you. 

Helping you to trust and obey God is also treating him like your best-friend  or companion you may be dating or are married to. Of course he is above all of these, but it's to be in constant conversation with him. Through prayer you can talk to God any where. Not only in church, in the car, on your bed, at the gym, everywhere. Through conversing with him you are welcome to tell him anything on your heart, ask him questions and he'll answer you if you are righteousness.

Psalm 55:22

Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.

God doesn't want you and I to keep anything in our hearts and minds too long. He wants us to use him, lean on and cast our cares and burdens on him. Another easy way to trust and obey him is letting him take care of you, your trials at the time, and allowing him to give you advice or completely solve it for you. This gives you time to obey God as you trust and have faith he'll work things out.

What hindered my spiritual life and brought me further and further away from God was hanging around LUKEWARM Christians. Christians who choose what to obey God in and what to not obey God in. For example it was ok to trust and obey God to pass an exam in school, but they didn't trust and obey God in abstaining from pre-marital sex and drinking. Sis, brother, being lukewarm gets you to HELL. Be smart; If you care about your salvation or life, your company has to be dropped!

I pray you all seek to truly Trust and Obey God, and you aren't all talk and no walk.

(Trust & Obey Song)

Lets Connect on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram 

From your Sister in Christ with a Servants Heart,

Janet Adeola Songonuga

*Please "Like", comment, and share this post if this spoke to you. Subscribe to the right for more.*

(Femi TheEntertainer  & I at the GCEN Night of Gospel Laughs Yesterday)

4th Annual Lead Nigerian Leadership Summit 2013

Wednesday August 21st, 2013

So, I attended an amazing event this past Saturday. The 4th Annual Lead Nigerian Leadership Summit.

First a little about Lead Nigeria

 "Lead Nigeria seeks to provide comprehensive leadership programs that challenge the understanding of basic issues involving youths and young people as well as their leadership competencies with much training and emphasis on real life scenarios and world cases. They believe that cross-sector partnership is a vital key to creating positive change, hence why projects and programs involve young people in the critical thinking process, engaging them to think creatively about new models, new technologies that provide practical solutions to societal issues through the development of specific and measurable commitments to action, thereby opening a unique opportunity to channel the capacities of individuals and organization to realize real change."

The object of the annual leadership summit, this year being the 4th one was "designed to bring together Nigerian Professionals, Academicians and Entrepreneurs from all across the Diaspora, especially youths and young people to discuss about Nigeria’s present leadership issues, and familiarize participants with the leadership styles and strategies needed in the partnership required to deliver results that will trickle down to Nigerians at home and how diaspora Nigerians can add their own quota at this moment, partnering with Nigerians at home and the government for the economic growth of the country."

On to, Saturday August 17th, 2013; The event started a little late but certain structural elements and panelists were still making their way into the event. I took that time to take some pictures.

(Venue:Awesome View from the 18th floor Skytop Ballroom at Hotel Pennsylvania)

After a brief welcome, the first panel was on youth empowerment and sustaining the youth in the diaspora and in Nigeria. The awesome panelist included:

Ernesto Malave Jr- Administrative Coordinator for the Model New York State Senate Session Project

Ozioma Egwuonwu- Founder of BurnBright Lifeworks Inc.

Bobby Digi- Serial Entrepreneur  

Moderator: Omoruyi Aigbe

Questions posed to each panelist from the moderator included 

    1.How can youth empowerment be defined?

Answers included youth empowerment can be defined as ones confidence, self-reliance, and having the will to empower others from their own personal empowerment; Youth empowerment strips the fear you have within yourself; having ownership and knowledge, meaning being free from modern day slavery which includes ones culture and media, stop and frisk, and laws that have been since out-lawed; it helps you recognize family life is important; and finally it strips having a victim mentality.

     2. Who is a youth?

Answers included youth are people that work towards their generation; people ages 13-30. 

     3. How to identify and cultivate your identity?

Answers included to develop your identity, is to strengthenyour inner and outer core; being transparent,  consistent by being a doer; being the best you can be; connecting your story to others; and staying focused.

The quote that tied this panel together was from Ernesto Malave, he stated "Everyone needs a therapist" This struck a cord with me and is definitely true. For youth to be empowered they have to be able to talk about the fears and struggles they may be facing to someone. Often times our families and friends can only do so much. The perfect therapist to keep in mind is Jesus Christ; Whom you can talk to, that won't judge you but love and give you sound advice.

After this first panel a "Barrister" a lawyer that works in the Nigerian Government came up to speak. He explained how the Nigerian Constitution was written and broken up. He explained how Nigeria is broken up into 36 states and 736 local governments. There are 3 legal systems within the Constitution which includes Sharia law, commercial law, and customary law (which is what we Africans in the Diaspora fall under) . His opinion was, there is nothing wrong with the structure of the federal constitution  but feels having so many local governments reduced the funding to each. He feels eliminating local governance and just having state governance would strengthen the entire country.He also feels stronger leaders are needed to implement the already well written constitution.

(World's Most Expensive DJ: DJ Universe & Ijeoma Mbamalu Publicist-Managing Director of Mon Utopie Ideal-The PR Company)

(Me and the World's Most Expensive DJ: DJ Universe)

The Second Panel followed right after. It highlighted policy making in Nigeria and the power of Social Media. Panelists included:

 Fiyinfoluwa Elegbede- Columnist for AfricanLiberty.org 

Aroa Ameny- Founder & Executive Director of the (AAJW) Association of African Journalists & Writers

Kunle Ayodeji- Co-creator and co-host of Radio-Show& Blog Culture Shock: Nigerians in America

Reginald Bassey- Senior Legislative Aide and Chief of Staff in the House of Representatives at the National Assembly, Abuja

DJ Universe- Creator of AfroPop & Luxury Music

Divine Muragijimana- Moderator 

What I particularly learned in this panel was social media is a really important tool in connecting the youth in the diaspora and the youth in Nigeria. We can really make changes through social media on how even the government rules on certain cases. I know for the upcoming 2015 Election there is a planed sit in by all Nigerian youth in Afolabi, Lagos Square on October 1st. (still working on confirming this location, please check back with me for up to date information. My email is janet.songonuga@gmail.com)

The event overall was phenomenal. I got to ask questions about my cultural differences as a Nigerian that was raised here in America,how Nigerian's cultural and corruptible depictions can suppress us up and coming leaders, to make us want to deter from being in leadership and more. I really got an understanding of what Nigeria needs through this meeting. It needs more leaders. Although businesses are needed to help the economy, which by the way it was quoted at this event "this is the best time to invest and or open up a business in Nigeria", leaders are needed to help the country as a whole function. Again that's the whole reason the organization Lead Nigeria exists. 

(With CEO,Founder of Lead Nigera Teddy Ifeanyi)

I look forward to next year.

To read more: http://leadnigeria.org/index.php/2012-03-11-22-53-46/blog/17-first-blog-post

Lets Connect on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram 

From your Sister in Christ with a Servants Heart,

Janet Adeola Songonuga

*Please "Like", comment, and share this post if this spoke to you. Subscribe to the right for more.*

So you want to Get Married? (Marriage Committee: What is that?!)

Thursday August 15th, 2013

Ok, so I met this guy. He is really really good looking..Oh God help me he is FYNE. He is Born Again, like he is a genuine Born Again Christian, so you know how I love men of GOD...they are the Leaders of our future home. Ok so he has his bills together, he is educated and so smart! Girl he has everything on my LIST. He loves to work out, eat nice food, pray, plus he is a member of my church! And bonus the conversations are so good! God have mercy, I feel something, I need to start praying, help me pray sis.

PAUSE

This is a typical conversation of many of us Christian Girls when we first meet a guy and some of us even say OH, "I def saw the will of God", "he is my Husband", I mean ok you may have seen the will of God but then you question if he really is the will because based on your feelings ALONE he qualifies.

GIRL SLOW DOWN, SLOW YOUR ROLL. Let's talk a bit:

I totally understand, this has happened to me. Maybe it's even happening to me now lol. Difference is though I am laying my feelings totally at the feet of Jesus are you?

Sis, I understand marriage is a big desire of yours, even though you are pursing the things of Christ wholeheartedly like (Matthew 6:33), you still pray for God to protect your husband till he finds you. Although you may desire marriage, sis it's not to be taken lightly by ANY-MEANS. It's not to be labeled and thrown on any guy that may meet all your checks and check nots. It's not a thing to enter if you haven't gotten certain things done and completed.

So you want to be married? Let me share with you some biblical principles on what you need to do before you should think about marriage and to entertain a guy as more than a church friend or brother in Christ...because if you and this "church brother in Christ" are really enjoying talking and looking at each other, if he says God saw the will of God in marrying  are you ready to drop your entire SINGLE life to marry him, submit to him and really die of your flesh, wants and needs daily?! 

       1. You MUST be a Born Again Christian: 

Galatians 2:20

 I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.

Once you become a  born again Christian you allow God to be your everything. He starts plucking and weeding out the bad in your life and replacing it with the Good. He starts to show you submission you'll need to submit to your husband, as you submit to God's will and commandments. There are things God may show you that your husband may not show you when you get into an argument in courtship and marriage. You must be really in tune with your spirit.  A couple that stays together PRAYS together. Prayer only can be done effectively when you have an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ. 

       2. You must be be able to hear God's voice:

John 5:30

 I can of mine own self do nothing: as I hear, I judge: and my judgment is just; because I seek not mine own will, but the will of the Father which hath sent me.

Now we are living for Jesus, our old life is done away with and now we are new creatures. We must now understand, nothing including mere friendship, courting and marriage must not be done without Gods consent. You have to be able to clearly hear from God. I am not saying look for a thunderstorm a burning bush, or something real DRAMATIC to know it's God. God simply works in subtle ways. Not having peace when God is the king of peace is a sign something is not right and needs to be looked into. Whatever God has used in your life to show you something, God can and will use that. Just remember though, God asks you to listen and obey him in little things before he will trust you with bigger things.

       3. GET your education and purpose as a SINGLE person right:

Proverbs 31: 13

 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.

Proverbs 31:24 

She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

Listen this was me; I knew I wanted to finish college before marrying. But I am thinking ok I can meet my husband now in college and then by the time I finish college, we'll have courted gotten to know each other and marry. THIS IS not entirely wrong but ladies you need to understand God does not encourage a long courtship period, examples of people dating for 5,6 years before marrying  may be done because of unforeseen circumstances. Courtship, getting to know each other is done with the intention of marrying soon because you are working towards it. Sexual temptation will come and it's REAL. Look at the world now, so many people lose their virginity before High School! So in saying that to be an increase not a deficit but an asset to your marriage you must endeavor to finish part of education before entertaining a guy. You must understand what God has called you to do in your single life besides pursuing motherhood and tending a lovely home when married. FORGET that marriage where one spouse dropped his schooling because God called him to preach. Forget that example of that wife that dropped out of college and now is blessed to be a stay at home wife. Those people had their own calling on their lives. You are different. Understand God wants the best for you, to be a proverbs 31 woman, a woman who uses her hands to work and makes wealth, you do just that and finish your education. If you are no where near complete with school, sis your boy of interest and person you most contact should be JESUS CHRIST ONLY.

Those are the three critical things you really need to ask yourself sis. Have you done all 3? If so, do you feel ready for God to bring your husband to you? If so, you may then meet someone that God ministers to you and matches God's will for you, then God knew the time is perfect. Go ahead and start courtship to lead into marriage;  Then start to share you heart and intimate moments with him. Start to pray, do bible study, and talk about the future together. I want to share with you this really awesome process my Church uses to help guide you once you may have found the will of marriage for you. It's called the Marriage Committee. 

So basically you don't come to the marriage committee when this person has proposed to you and you already skipped the intent of this committee. This committee helps you, by praying with you about the will of God, God has revealed to you in your private prayer. Once you hear God minister to you about a person, feelings spiritually and not only physical have been birthed you approach the marriage committee at my church and they start to pray with you! They intercede to God on your behalf because, listen SIS marriage is FOR LIFE, so prayers from righteous people are important! Once the marriage committee has also confirmed with you he is the one, they let the pastor know and he also prays.The committee discourages brother and sister relations before the marriage committee process is over. Listen at this point sis, if that man is for you, what God has for you will be for you, so don't fear if the committee or Pastor say no. After all these confirmations they approach the guy and let him know the will of God for him concerning you, and then he also prays about it. I have heard many stories in which the Guy also heard Gods will for you sis. So truly when you do things GOD's way, God will truly bless you!

Sister rest in Jesus. Cherish your single years. Have your butterflies and heart flutters come from Jesus. Your husband in Christ will find you without all the temporary theatrics the world uses. 

Psalm 37:7

 Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for him: 

(Me street evangelizing this past Wednesday!)

From your Sister in Christ with a Servants Heart,

Janet Adeola Songonuga

*Please "Like", comment, and share this post if this spoke to you. Subscribe to the right for more.*