WHY is she so relationship CRAZED?!

Wednesday October 30rd , 2013

At 14 I knew I had a desire to marry. 

I was a sophomore in High School at that time. Sadly my past of sexual perversion had already started at the age of 13, from the Public school system telling me Masturbation was ok(its NOT),

My mom, I remember vaguely  would tell me to dispel TV shows I watched, by saying dating wasn't ok, and that God had a special husband for me. She never really explained why though. She just SAID. 

But the shows and what I was seeing in school wasn't the case. Everyone had a boyfriend, everyone had a girlfriend. Well not everyone.. but a lot of people. So since my mom had said, there was a special husband for me, and in my Heart I so desired to be loved by a man, I determined no guy would date me unless they were to be my husband. And this is how I started dating.

 Still a virgin, I started dating. Thinking and making sure every man I called my "boyfriend" could be my husband. From boyfriend one, to two, to three my mom and dad would just run them off. Although I would always meet the man's family, my parents did not want that, and thinking back at it I thank God, because those men weren't it. However the appetite for marriage should have been embraced in my opinion, but that's another blog.

Due to this train of dating and being close to the opposite sex, clearly both our hormones flared up. We liked each other, so of course physical emotions would be breed from these feelings. Whether only the first base, or second base, or third base, it was physical intimacy that ONLY should have been kept till marriage. Yep yep, kissing counts and that should be kept for marriage. Why? Kissing is FORPLAY to sexual intercourse. PERIOD. Because I and so many other girls dabbled into this physical intimacy, it was a matter of time before we fall into full on fornication. I am no different and so it happened to me. If you dabble into physical intimacy and he is not your husband, the forskin God intended to be broken only by your husband will be broken prematurely and you will commit fornication.

Because I desired marriage, in these relationships I had, I made these men my husband in my heart. I heard of the actions of a Godly woman, and my mom was surely a godly woman so I followed suit. I would play wife to my boyfriends. This is also what culture teaches, that its ok to full on Test Drive an individual before committing to that person. (ITS NOT)

My desire for marriage was clearly marked out of my desire for love outside of my parents love. Love that ALL believers used temporary fillers to fill before they found Jesus. Although my worldly boyfriends and relationships weren't perfect, the type of love I "thought" I felt was something different from what I was used to, and because it was sin,once I started I get hooked. But this sin of wanting a perverted temporary filled love, lead to destruction in my moral character, academics, finances, relationships and more. Due to infatuation for these boyfriends, I was willing to break the law for them. Crazy right? Tell me about it..but the reality is this was the reality of most of the girls I hung out with and many many girls in this world today.

So when I attended a Single and Marriage seminar last year, after entering yet another relationship with a guy who wanted to marry me,and I felt was suitable to marry, after being months apart from church, I was able to reflect on my life. This void of Love I was trying to fill wasn't really being filled because I knew true love doesn't make you SIN and do CRAZY things. The teachers and Pastors of the seminar were explaining this divine love portrayed in the bible, from our maker God. I was thinking to myself, these ways I had been trying to fill this love, seemed really un-fulfilling; this way of life caused immediate sorrow in my heart, and became so repulsive. God started to convict me that day, he started to show me I was a sinner truly and that without him my life was headed for destruction! That was November 24, and I gave my life to Christ and broke up with my boyfriend November 25 2012.

The fact is now in faith I am so happy and content with the ULTIMATE LOVE Of all, MY husband JESUS Christ. But he made me and cultivated me with a purpose, and a big part is to Marry to be a help-meet to the husband he has formulated for me, replenish the earth, and be a keeper of the home. God placed this desire in my heart, and its very natural for woman after puberty to have this desire.But because I,we lack God's love in my heart the devil pushes us to perverse love. Now in faith, God has opened my blind eyes on how to go about entering into a relationship he has ordained  me for. He is showing me all the wrong I did in the world and giving me wisdom on how to make the wrong right.

Because I came from a place where relationships ran my life before Christ, God has placed it on my heart to help not only my self, but my blood sisters, church sisters, and sisters and brothers all around the world understand the biblical way of love when it comes to marriage, and Dispelling the world's view. The world's view is creating more single parent homes, broken families, and sexual perverted desires.

I know God is preparing me to start a movement and bring many people to the Lord and into sexual purity in my single life and when married.

Sisters rest: There is a season for everything. Ecclesiastics 3. God hasn't forgotten your season of love and wedding bliss. I am here to push you, to encourage you to have a heart after God so you are ready for God to bring his best for you. <3

(Picture from a Pinky Promise Northern NJ Event)

From your Sister in Christ with a Servants Heart,

Janet Adeola Songonuga

*Look out for my blogs coming out this week. The dangers of Porn" & "Unashamed  Virgin: 20 year olds and up